Wife has cancer, considering a motorhome

[DogLovers]

Im so sorry to read of your plight. We all pray for you and your good wife. When twilight approaches we all tend to reflect and seek home but not you and your wife. Traveling at this juncture seems bold and bespeaks the type of people you are. I have a feeling it would have been great to have known the two of you for the last 15 years. You're much stronger than me because I don't think I could take on this new venture when faced with these obsticles. Bravo my friend. In that your future is so uncertain at this time, I might opt to rent a few times before committing a large sum to something Im unsure of the longevity of.

God bless you both.

[knucklehead]

Originally Posted by AllenF

Apologies....I'm typing this on cell while in bed.

My wife got diagnosed w stg 4 lung cancer. It's colon cancer but it has spread to her liver...all quadrants. Too many lesions to count. I don't know how long she has. I am pleasantly surprised she made it to Christmas. We are both 50 years old, been together about 15 years.

She can't travel....the colon cancer causes rectal pain. The chemo is helping. She handled a 1 hour drive in my Nissan Frontier to see Christmas lights from the truck.

In talking....she mentioned she could maybe make it a few hours on the road if she could get off a sitting position.

I had been looking at conversion vans and handicap setups but they don't seem to fit the bill.

My history of camping is limited to weekend tent camping w cooking over a fire w my two sons when they were little. They are 19 and 22 now so its been a few years.

I dont know anything about motor homes. I worked in the medical field when my back was good and now I do software customer service for medical related software.

Obviously I'm going through some stuff here...been here in the house on lockdown since 2019 and my wife's been out of work since July. She is moving towards putting puzzles together and watching home improvement shows to pass the time.

I had been looking at something like a mypod...just to go to the lake for a night or two, clear my head, try to figure out what my future looks like....or try to not think about it for a few hours, I dont know....maybe both.

Through that bit of searching....I get an ad from a place I hate....camping world or whatever it's called.

Its a Thor 22CMF. I never really looked at motorhomes. Sure I like the lake....and from here we travel to Asheville NC, Pigeon Forge TN, Savannah GA, Charleston SC, Hilton Head SC, Wilmington...even Florida. But a motorhome??? No. I was a consultant and always had free hotel rooms using points.

The days of hotel points are gone and wife can't travel.

I showed my wife a couple youtubes of the 22B and 22CMF.... she loved the lidea. Thinks she could travel again like that. No idea how much time she has left. Is it months? More than a year? Couple years? We don't know. Either way it isn't a "long game" type of decision. It's a sooner than later decision point.

Smart financially? No...not sure I care, can swing it in the mid 80s though.

Went to read reviews...found this forum in Google results.... thought i would throw this out there and see what people say.

Is this something that might be workable to give my wife a chance to visit our old local travel destinations a few more times?

I am SO SORRY to hear your wife is dealing with that awful thing!! My wife of 18 years passed from the same thing Sept. 14th of 2021. We had been RV owners since July of 2017. Then in 2018 we upgraded to a Thor Windsport 29m cause I wanted a King size bed and a dinette. We planned a trip to California and were going to leave Sept. 6th. On May 16th she got the bad news. We still went and I am so glad she wes able to travel and enjoy herself. It was the best month or our marriage. I want to let you know I will be praying for your dear wife and IF she can travel, I think that would be a great gift for the both of you. You may want to consider renting an RV rather than buy one but I still have our's and I still LOVE TO RV. Whatever you decide, please let me know what and how she is doing. My email address rtricejr@live.com. God Bless; Robert Trice Jr

[Danny boy]

I’m very sorry to hear about your wife’s illness and will pray for you both. My wife was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer 7 years ago. By the Lord’ mercy she was healed and has been in remission for 6 ½ years. I say all of that to let you know we bought our first RV when she was getting close to finishing her chemo treatments. We had been looking and talking about purchasing an RV for a couple of years prior to her diagnosis. At the time of her illness, we did not know if she would survive and we decided we would make some new memories traveling together and have no regrets. It was something I especially wanted to do for her. So, I would say, if buying an RV is something that you both could enjoy together for whatever time you have, I would recommend it. We have thoroughly enjoyed our travels together.

[Ellen M]

I, too, am a colon cancer patient, so my sympathies are with you. I have been most fortunate to have discovered this mess very early and with absolutely amazing medical care have been dealing with this for 22 years.
Last year we purchased a new Thor ACE 30.3. It has spent more time on warranty work than on the road. If you are going to purchase one of these please seriously consider a newish used one. You might actually get to use it!

[bustin]

First wife was chronically ill: on oxygen, legally blind and in wheelchair, walking short distance okay (to BR) for last few years of her life. Got RV to do some travel with our children (ages 8-18 at the time) and it did not go well. Wish we had just spent quality time at home. She died a year later. I am saying to you, what I wish I had heard back then. Think hard before making such a big change and God Bless.

[Pabs4]

Originally Posted by The Gritz Carlton

Sounds like you've been bitten by the RV Bug and have made the call. There's definitely advantages to traveling in an RV. We do a lot of "day trips" in ours down here...festivals, parades, etc. It's nice to have your fridge, bathroom and comfortable quarters (A/C) with you wherever you go. We're taking it over to Pier Park early Saturday for the Beach Ball Drop at midnight. It's the only night of the year they allow over-night parking in the parking lots. As things progress with her, the timelines for necessities will grow shorter. Having everything you immediately need will be with you. Seating in most RV's isn't very comfortable so include her in the process...recliner seating versus the short sofas would be a plus. Ask God to lead you in this process...He's the only one I know that has all the answers...and most important, listen to what He says. God Speed in this journey!

I agree with Gritz. It sounds like you have thought about this, and have made your decision. Even with a new RV you need to expect some things to go wrong. I think it will be very important to carefully choose the dealer you purchase from. It will be important for you to have any repairs, etc. done quickly and efficiently.

I am so very sorry you and your wife are having to experience this. Some of the best times my husband and I have had are traveling in our rv. As Gritz said, ask God to lead you. Praying for you both.

Pam

[Equishell]

I have a husband who is very handy and we still spend way too much time fixing things on a Motorhome in my book. If you just need comfortable transit I would look into a van that has convertible seats that make a bed. Renting a Motorhome to see if you like it and are comfortable driving it is probably a really good idea, even if you think you know what you want. Getting anything fixed at a dealer is an exercise in frustration, many having waiting lists that are months out because of parts and personnel issues. I am very sorry to hear about your wife’s medical issues and hope you can make some wonderful memories with whatever you decide.

[Rickszat@gmail.com]

So sorry to hear about your wife and the changes in your life. I went through an 8-year journey with my late wife as we battled brain tumors (52 yrs old - 60 yrs old).

I will tell you to do whatever possible to enjoy life together during this time. We travelled when we could, but I didn't get an RV (Thor Delano) until after she passed away. I did purchase it new going into the pandemic and it has been a great way to travel in our own "bubble", something that you need to consider with chemo and compromised immunities.

An additional piece of advice is to evaluate the height to get in/out of the vehicle, both the seating and the coach/house steps. From my experiences with my late wife, there were many, many months where stairs are not an option and I actually had to lift/boost her into the seat/vehicle (chose an SUV height vehicle as best height).

Best of luck to both of you as you make new memories during these trying times.

[Capt.Tom]

Sorry to hear about your wife's cancer. I have stage 4 metastatic cancer in my lungs, it's prostate cancer.
My wife had a rare stomach cancer removed 12/20 at MD Anderson in Houston and drove our Miramar 35c home to Florida soon after. She was comfortable and had her own bathroom that she could use at a moments notice. She made out great and is cancer free so far.
Then we found out my prostate cancer had gone metastatic after being removed in 12/21. I have a few years to live and we are making the most of it. Travel in the motorhome definitely has it's advantages. We just got back from visiting my daughter in Georgia, 500 .Iles each way. We took two days each way as opposed to all in one day we would have in the old days. Both of us need stops frequently to use the bathroom and having your own removes that worry.
The other thing is that you wife can lY down and take a nap or watch TV on a very comfortable sofa while you drive. In our case I need a 1/2 hour power nap occasionally an that is easy in the motorhome.
The rental idea is probably wise if your wife's prognosis is bad . You don't have to store it, maintain it or fix it if it breaks. If your wife's prognosis improves then you can invest with some comparisons.
In our case my wife will want to downsize because she doesn't want to drive a 39' class A but I don't think she would be happy with a class B. She have gotten used to a real bath room with a real shower
. Best wishes and good luck.

[Bob Denman]

Welcome to our Family!
I am sorry to be so late to this discussion. I have a perspective to this situation that hits pretty close to home...
My Kathy and I purchased a Tiffin Wayfarer in December of 2018. It was our 2nd RV. In the Spring of 2019: she was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colon Cancer. We continued to use our RV right up to Memorial Day weekend of 2022. After that point: things got much worse, and she passed on September 6th...
But we treasured each and every one of our trips! It gave us time together to reflect on our 41 years together, and plan for the uncertainties that lay before us.

I hope and pray that your path has a happier outcome for you both! Never stop fighting for her!

[DogLovers]

Originally Posted by Bob Denman

Welcome to our Family!
I am sorry to be so late to this discussion. I have a perspective to this situation that hits pretty close to home...
My Kathy and I purchased a Tiffin Wayfarer in December of 2018. It was our 2nd RV. In the Spring of 2019: she was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colon Cancer. We continued to use our RV right up to Memorial Day weekend of 2022. After that point: things got much worse, and she passed on September 6th...
But we treasured each and every one of our trips! It gave us time together to reflect on our 41 years together, and plan for the uncertainties that lay before us.

I hope and pray that your path has a happier outcome for you both! Never stop fighting for her!

Hello Bob my old friend. Im sorry to hear your lovely wife passed on. As much as we joke about the wives we all know we would move heaven & earth if possible to protect them. I pray for you my friend, it's hard going forward and I know that. Your struggle will ensure you see her again in that great RV park in the sky. We lost both of our loved and cherished Shih Tzu's in July and Sept this year. We have been devestated. 15 years raised from puppies and each had their own personalities, quirks, favorites and a rather unique set of tricks they learned. We cried like children when they passed and still do. I can't imagine losing my wife. God bless you.

[Pabs4]

Originally Posted by Bob Denman

Welcome to our Family!
I am sorry to be so late to this discussion. I have a perspective to this situation that hits pretty close to home...
My Kathy and I purchased a Tiffin Wayfarer in December of 2018. It was our 2nd RV. In the Spring of 2019: she was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colon Cancer. We continued to use our RV right up to Memorial Day weekend of 2022. After that point: things got much worse, and she passed on September 6th...
But we treasured each and every one of our trips! It gave us time together to reflect on our 41 years together, and plan for the uncertainties that lay before us.

I hope and pray that your path has a happier outcome for you both! Never stop fighting for her!

Oh, Bob. I didn’t know Kathy had passed away. I’m so, so very sorry. Sending prayers, and a virtual hug.

Pam

[The Gritz Carlton]

This is/was a very sweet post about a wonderful love affair about to come to a temporary end and the last minute options to comfort someone as best you can. If you guys want to start a debate about 5,000 years of cancer research and results, why don't you start another one with that title and leave this one on subject.

[16ACE27]

Originally Posted by The Gritz Carlton

This is/was a very sweet post about a wonderful love affair about to come to a temporary end and the last minute options to comfort someone as best you can. If you guys want to start a debate about 5,000 years of cancer research and results, why don't you start another one with that title and leave this one on subject.

Good point

Posts deleted.

[MLP]

Yes I too had cancer and so did my wife. She was 15 years old and I got it at 48. I don't wish it on anyone.

We will both keep you and your wife in out prayers.

[AllenF]

Thanks for all the replies.

Based on some feedback etc. We are looking at Class Bs now.

My condolences to those with unfortunate shared experience with illness.

She is making me promise to use this to travel even when she isn't here but really likes the Bs.

I am 5'8 170lbs. Small sports cars and coach flying works great for me, I suspect a B will be fine as well.

I could probably use one as my only vehicle and sell my truck.

Thanks for all the input so far.

[NurseNellie]

In 2017, I took a Transit T-250 cargo van and converted it into a "steel tent". It had a king-sized bed; a Luggable Loo for a potty, and a small sink that utilized 2-1/2 gallon jugs as freshwater and graywater. Electric hot plate to cook on.

I LOVED the Transit chassis - ours had the Ecoboost motor and was truly enjoyable to drive. The mid-height roof allowed me to stand upright; Hubby had to duck a bit (he's 6'3"). It parked anywhere a pickup truck could park; the 148" wheelbase model was only 20' long. There are many different custom builders out there who could give you something that would be perfect for you and your wife's comfort - I would suggest checking out the Sportsmobile website simply because it shows all the possibilities available.

Most "Regular Class B" motorhomes are built on the taller, longer chassis. I'm not saying that you can't use one for a daily driver, but the mid-sized vans fit anywhere.

Best wishes!!

[AllenF]

I am looking at a 2023 Thor Scope 28A.

It's 17ft on the Ram 1500 chasis.

I looked into ordering a custom mattress to make the rear 72x39 bed into a permanent bed for a while. Use the walkway under the bed for storage.

Pros: Only 17ft! It has the roof bunk for extra sleeping. I like that it has the removable porta potta to get extra room fir a shower and I like that this one comes with a generator as opposed to the battery only 20a.

It's also over well over $5k cheaper.

Cons: It gives up the ability to sleep 2 adults in the back, the TV is gone and the AC is a smaller cabinet 5300 btu unit than the 11000 btu roof unit on the 20a. The luggage rack is gone but then you also don't need to worry w the roof ladder. Bathroom is a tad smaller overall.

Otherwise, the 18a seems like a competent "mini 20a"

It looks like it has everything I would need for a '3fer",
a. Wife transport
b. Extended trips to visit family (I'm on the GA/SC border and have family from Texas to NC to Florida.
C. Weekend warrior duty as a camper for just me or maybe me and my brother.


https://youtu.be/5Cr7UttwGAs

https://youtu.be/xb-0aG8E70E

[AllenF]

Extra posts

It seems clear I missed a few posts of others sharing their experiences when I posted the last couple times.

I wanted to say thank you an additional time for all the shares.

We aren't unrealistic that this may not end up being some kind of panacea for the situation.....which is why it's important to evaluate my use cases both with and without her.

Due to the comments here about back ups with repairs....I plan to keep my truck around so I have something to drive

....and buy new.

......and buy small so I can use it for more situations and on more trips.. (basically anything over an hour and I might chose to take this as long as i keep it under 10k miles a year for warranty purposes.)

.....and double up on extended warranties.