Wife has cancer, considering a motorhome

[AllenF]

Apologies....I'm typing this on cell while in bed.

My wife got diagnosed w stg 4 lung cancer. It's colon cancer but it has spread to her liver...all quadrants. Too many lesions to count. I don't know how long she has. I am pleasantly surprised she made it to Christmas. We are both 50 years old, been together about 15 years.

She can't travel....the colon cancer causes rectal pain. The chemo is helping. She handled a 1 hour drive in my Nissan Frontier to see Christmas lights from the truck.

In talking....she mentioned she could maybe make it a few hours on the road if she could get off a sitting position.

I had been looking at conversion vans and handicap setups but they don't seem to fit the bill.

My history of camping is limited to weekend tent camping w cooking over a fire w my two sons when they were little. They are 19 and 22 now so its been a few years.

I dont know anything about motor homes. I worked in the medical field when my back was good and now I do software customer service for medical related software.

Obviously I'm going through some stuff here...been here in the house on lockdown since 2019 and my wife's been out of work since July. She is moving towards putting puzzles together and watching home improvement shows to pass the time.

I had been looking at something like a mypod...just to go to the lake for a night or two, clear my head, try to figure out what my future looks like....or try to not think about it for a few hours, I dont know....maybe both.

Through that bit of searching....I get an ad from a place I hate....camping world or whatever it's called.

Its a Thor 22CMF. I never really looked at motorhomes. Sure I like the lake....and from here we travel to Asheville NC, Pigeon Forge TN, Savannah GA, Charleston SC, Hilton Head SC, Wilmington...even Florida. But a motorhome??? No. I was a consultant and always had free hotel rooms using points.

The days of hotel points are gone and wife can't travel.

I showed my wife a couple youtubes of the 22B and 22CMF.... she loved the lidea. Thinks she could travel again like that. No idea how much time she has left. Is it months? More than a year? Couple years? We don't know. Either way it isn't a "long game" type of decision. It's a sooner than later decision point.

Smart financially? No...not sure I care, can swing it in the mid 80s though.

Went to read reviews...found this forum in Google results.... thought i would throw this out there and see what people say.

Is this something that might be workable to give my wife a chance to visit our old local travel destinations a few more times?

[EA37TS]

Welcome to the forum.

I will not comment on the medical problems because I am not a doctor and you didn’t mention what the doctor’s orders are.

If you decide to buy a Motorhome, with your limited knowledge hire a professional certified inspector to go over the entire unit with a fine tooth comb. Do not under any circumstances take delivery of the unit until all problems, repeat all problems have been taken care of.and corrected to yours and the inspector’s satisfaction.

As a note, and I normally do not plug things like this, if you do decide as to get a Motorhome, with the medical condition you should look into FMCA and their FMCA Assist program. Extremely valuable during medical emergencies when traveling away from home.

Again, welcome to the forum.

[Chance]

So sorry to hear and hope she improves.


I always recommend renting first, and in your case more than ever. The last thing I’d want would be to spend time fixing RV problems when you have so many challenges already. Also, in my limited experience, when people don’t feel great they usually want to be home.

Rentals would give you opportunities to try it out and see how it works.

[Judge]

I’m very sorry for you and your wife.

I know another guy in a similar in your situation. He bought a new a Thor Magnitude and had a lot of issues and he never got to really use it like he hoped before his wife passed.

If I were you and you can’t make a Class B van work for her, I would purchase a model without a slide. It’s one less thing to worry about.

The rental idea above is not a bad idea as well. Most them don’t have a slide so they are slightly more bulletproof.

I don’t know how much time you have left with your wife where she will be able to travel but the last thing you want to do is spend more time having things fixed than using it.

Even if you hire a professional to inspect it before purchase, there are things that can and will pop up an inspection won’t catch.

If you go the rental route with a national chain, you should be able to get it swapped out quickly for another one.

[powerboatr]

concur with renting a few different types etc.

lots to learn first time and your going to be already most likely really busy


if its just a day trip or something like that, a large suv with fold down seats, you could put in a nice mattress for her to stretch out on.


if your staying at treatment hospital long term, a class C or A may be the good option.

like you said, days, weeks or months or years are all unknowns


pray for you we will.

[Pillbox]

Sorry to hear this. I am in the same boat.
Yes, yes ,yes, go rent a few different ones first.
Not to be a kill joy, but my wife can manage a week out at most. And that only works if the chemo did not kick her ass.
Wife has stage 4 lung cancer also. Yes throughout her body. I think every day I should sell my rv, well because of non use. BUT, when she can do stuff, its times like this i get to cherish the moments with her and see the enjoyment of the journey in her eyes.
You cant put a price on that.
Stay strong, God bless and I thank the Lord everyday I get to hold her.
Terry

[Judge]

Originally Posted by Pillbox

Sorry to hear this. I am in the same boat.
Yes, yes ,yes, go rent a few different ones first.
Not to be a kill joy, but my wife can manage a week out at most. And that only works if the chemo did not kick her ass.
Wife has stage 4 lung cancer also. Yes throughout her body. I think every day I should sell my rv, well because of non use. BUT, when she can do stuff, its times like this i get to cherish the moments with her and see the enjoyment of the journey in her eyes.
You cant put a price on that.
Stay strong, God bless and I thank the Lord everyday I get to hold her.
Terry

I know your story from our past discussions my friend....... but you brought tears to my eyes again.

Make those memories as often and as long as you can. My prayers to you and her.... and the OP.

[EA37TS]

Not advocating one way or the other.

To those recommending renting a Motorhome, how many mobile home rental agencies sanitize, not clean but fully sanitize a rental unit from top to bottom before it goes out? My quests is none.

Someone with a terminal condition could become critical coming into contact with viruses or other crude left behind from previous renters or their animals. That’s why I first mentioned the Doctor’s Orders.

Keep in mind, the close confines of any rv can breed all kinds of crap if not properly sanitized from time to time.

Just food for thought.

[NurseNellie]

I'll just toss in that we bought our Thor 22E Class C to accommodate my husband's health issues (nothing life-threatening) It's nimble, fits darn near anywhere; and gives him the comfort that our previous truck camper lacked. Gives me the kitchen to prepare the food that keeps him healthy. I wish we would have owned it when he was in the hospital - I would have camped in the parking lot with my dogs, rather than drive back and forth twice a day, racking up 120+ miles daily.

Sending prayers for both of you!

[HarryTh]

If you find a rental unit that fits her needs and you have a trip in mind you could then post on here for a volunteer in your area with their own motorhome to lead you on your trip, help you set up and learn the aspects of motor home travel and when you feel you are ready, head out on your own.
We are in South Carolina and would volunteer to travel with you if we can fit it in to our schedule.
Put a lot of thought into this venture in life and I am sure there are many people on this forum that would do the same as we have offered.
Harry and Karin Thorn
Taamassee SC

[Chateau_Nomad]

After losing my only brother to renal cancer 3 years ago, I would say live with no regrets. You can't go back and do things together after they're gone.

[The Gritz Carlton]

All forms of a motorhome will require a lot of your time and will create more stress for you and your wife. If it were me, I'd concentrate every minute I had left with her at home or in a sticks and bricks structure. Or, consider a simple van type Class B with not many moving parts to cause trouble and take away from those Golden Hours.

[lwmcguir]

Originally Posted by The Gritz Carlton

All forms of a motorhome will require a lot of your time and will create more stress for you and your wife. If it were me, I'd concentrate every minute I had left with her at home or in a sticks and bricks structure. Or, consider a simple van type Class B with not many moving parts to cause trouble and take away from those Golden Hours.

I think Gritz nailed it. For the money either way he noted or just travel to higher end resorts and stay with no worries except when do we eat and at which restaurant.

RV ownership and maintenance isn't for anyone with their plate full already.

If were not staying out longer than 10 days that is exactly what we do now.

[Lt Keefer]

I also agree with gritz. RV ownership is a lot of work and RV rentals can be of questionable hygiene. I would spend my time hitting the higher end places within my wife's comfort zone.

[Elite Washington]

I am sorry to hear about your wife’s medical condition. My father just passed from liver cancer that wasn’t diagnosed until Oct so he only made it two months. I say that because you need to enjoy the time the best you can. Like what was said I would focus your time staying at resorts. Take a train just about anything that allows you more time to spend with her. Good speed and hopefully she can recover.

[AllenF]

Thank you all for the great advice. We definitely are maximizing time here at the house and we would go to resorts but due to rectal pain she just can't ride in the upright position on a firm seat more thsn an hour. Best she can often do is in a really good recliner or laying down. She can manage eating out, provided there isn't a long line and it's a good day, and she can manage about 30 minutes up and walking around as long as she can get to a bed for a couple hours afterwards. I'm looking at a brand new 2023 Thor 22EQ....the cheaper version on the Chevy chasis.

It's entirely possible this will provide some value to me once she is gone as well as my brothers like to camp as do my grown up kids....and most of us are past sleeping on the ground (though we are all very experienced in that). Could be useful as I am the last one in this house and might appreciate thr time with family.

For the wife it may just function as a shuttle to get her TO a hotel or out of state family, rather than as being viable living quarters. We never planned to be in it more than 4 to 6 days at once anyway with her chemo...have to keep our trips to adjacent states so basically, Florida Tennesse, Georgia and NC...maybe Alabama

[The Gritz Carlton]

Sounds like you've been bitten by the RV Bug and have made the call. There's definitely advantages to traveling in an RV. We do a lot of "day trips" in ours down here...festivals, parades, etc. It's nice to have your fridge, bathroom and comfortable quarters (A/C) with you wherever you go. We're taking it over to Pier Park early Saturday for the Beach Ball Drop at midnight. It's the only night of the year they allow over-night parking in the parking lots. As things progress with her, the timelines for necessities will grow shorter. Having everything you immediately need will be with you. Seating in most RV's isn't very comfortable so include her in the process...recliner seating versus the short sofas would be a plus. Ask God to lead you in this process...He's the only one I know that has all the answers...and most important, listen to what He says. God Speed in this journey!

[NurseNellie]

There is also "safety" that comes with RVing - it's not hard to completely exclude any contact with the public. The germy, virus-y public.....

[Kartvines@verizon.net]

I am handicapped and very limited on many things my wife and i are retired yet wanted to still visit many historical we never were able to visit while working. We decided that a motorhome was our answer because it provides up more control on how we get around with the ability to stop and take stock something planes and trains couldn’t provide us. We bought the smallness class A the 2022 Thor Vegas 24.4 we have only completed our first trip but we plan to take many more

[roy stone]

Bottom line, Rental seems to be a very good option. It would also provide you with experience with various kinds, and types of 'rigs' if you still wanted to purchase one. The best to you and your wife in the coming year and beyond.