I can't point to a manual, but no doubt you'll find volumes on the subject on this and other forums using a google search
basically, my 2 cents worth
make sure the black tank has a high level (many folks will give different numbers....more than x%, etc..) but I don't think it's all that critical, just make sure you don't habitually drain the black when there's almost nothing in it. Once in a while won't kill it...it's certainly not that critical...
make sure there's enough volume in the grey tank to rinse out the hose....
then
1) drain the black first.
2) then drain the grey. This pushes the left over waste out of the pipe with clearer grey water.
3) Then use the hose at the dump station to do a quick rinse inside the hose
4) run a few gallons of water into the black tank (so valve seals stay wet and to prime the tank. Want more liquid than solids in there). This does not have to be done at the dump station, later is fine....just pretty soon...can be done with the flush connection, or just by flushing the toilet a few bowls full
5)done
flushing isn't really necessary...ever.... no need to back up a line at the dump station. Do it if you feel the need and there's no line behind you...or at home.
make sure gaskets are in the stinky slinky when hooking up (no leaks is the goal!)
many folks don't use tank chemicals at all, and have no problems.
just use plenty of water when flushing poo
In my experience I keep a bottle of the blue stuff handy, and use it once in a while
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