My apologies to all for the panic and my pissy attitude. More investigation reveals that my shower water is going to the gray tank. I was wrong and sorry for firing anyone up. I haven't needed the dealer yet with the exception of an unconnected dash AC and I am happy self repairing as I go and thought this was beyond me.
I see that Thor routinely sends sink water to black as a standard. I'm not totally opposed to that however I would prefer to save black water holding capacity for what it's for. I can add water as needed. I suspect it was a convenience design by Thor rather than designing it so we have more water in the black tank.
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